Soundtrack of my Life

For the first time, I am writing on a prompt today. I found it at Mama's Losin' It, I guess she does a weekly prompt, giving you several to choose from. I saw it on another blog I follow and it sounded like fun, so I'm giving it a whirl. I chose the first prompt:

1.) Soundtrack of your life: Pick 10 songs that you would have on a soundtrack for your life, pick a line from each that you most identify with and write a short statement of why this song made it.

(inspired by Pua at Dino Momma)

In no particular order, this is what I came up with:

1. Praise You in the Storm by Casting Crowns

"And I'll praise you in this storm and I will life my hands
For you are who you are no matter where I am
And every tear I've cried you hold in your hand
You never left my side and through my heart is torn
I will praise you in this storm."

This kind of says it all. I've faced some sad things, and although I may have lost hope for a while, it always came back to the fact that God is (and was) there to comfort me, even when I didn't think I wanted him there. I'm still figuring out the whole part about praising him when things are tough, but I think thats one of those life long lessons.

2. Ironic by  Alanis Morisette

"Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
when you think everything's okay and everything's going right
and ya well life has a funny way of helping you out..."

I've always liked this song, it might be the writer in me getting a kick out of all the examples of irony that she lists. (You know, us writers are a moody bunch.) But it rings true for me. I laugh about it now, but in college, especially towards the end, all I wanted to do with my life was get my Masters in Creative Writing and live in a cabin in the woods by myself. I wanted nothing to do with marriage or children or helping people (that last part stems from a unfinished social work degree). Yet, that is exactly where I ended up! I think its cool how life just flips around on us sometimes, and I'm very grateful mine did, as I can't imagine it any different than it is right now.

3. Hanging by a Moment by  Lifehouse

"Forgetting all I'm lacking
Completely incomplete
I'll take your invitation
You take all of me now"

I heard this song on the radio on the way to one of our pre-marriage counseling sessions and it was perfect. I don't know why, but I had a tough time with that time. I was in love with the man of my dreams and was ready to marry him, but I think I had some anxiety and self-consciousness about letting him really get to know me. I really had to work at that during this time and for some reason this song really spoke to me. Of course I wasn't perfect, but he loved (still does!) me exactly as I was.

4. Too Much -- Dave Matthews Band

"I eat too much
I drink too much
I want too much
Too much"

This just about sums up college in these simple six words.

5. Smile by Vitamin C

"Put a smile on your face
make the world a better place
put a smile on your face
whatcha wanna do, say, whatcha gonna do?"

I'm a pessimist by nature, but I've always known the power of a smile, back when I was younger I use to say that smiling was the second best thing you could do with your mouth. Not exactly sure what the first thing was, but still. I just like this song. :-)

6. Fear by Sarah McLachlan

I think all of Sarah's albums could be my life soundtrack. I can't even tell you how many lines of poetry or chapters of novels have been written while listening to her music. But this one has always been one of my favorites:

"But I fear
I have nothing to give.
I have so much
to lose here in this lonely place.
Tangled up in your embrace
there's nothing I'd like better than
to fall.
But I fear
I have nothing to give."

I have a tendency towards self-doubt and a general feeling of unworthiness.

7. Jumper by Third Eye Blind

"Wish you would step back from that ledge my friend."

Unfortunately, I've lost two loved ones to suicide. This song has just always struck a chord with me.

8. The Hardway by DC Talk

"Some people gotta learn the hard way
I guess I'm the kind of guy who has to find out for myself
I had to learn the hard way, Father
I'm on my knees and I'm crying for help...

It took so long for me to see
that I'm a victim of nature and me
Left to myself, I realize
I am the maker of my own demise."

I confess, I'm thick headed, and unfortunately that means I had to learn the hard way. I am just grateful that my friends, family and especially my God, are gracious. Besides being true, this song brings me back to some really great high school memories.

9. Butterfly Kisses by Bob Carlisle

"Oh with all that I've done wrong, I must of done something right,
to deserve a hug every morning, and butterfly kisses at night."

My dad sang this song at my wedding and it does speak about our relationship as father and daughter. I always thought it was just the daddy-daughter thing, but now that I have kids of my own, I think its more of a parent-kid thing. Especially these lyrics, that us parents would be blessed with the love and affection of our sweet kids is a miracle. I can't listen to this whole song anymore, it makes me cry too easily.

10. Thriller by Michael Jackson

Honestly, none of the lyrics of this song really speak of my life. (Seriously, have you read the actual lyrics to this song!?) But the Thriller album is actually the first one I ever owned and I use to listen to the cassette (only one side, of course) at night as I fell asleep. Except I couldn't listen to the side that ended with the actual Thriller song, because that scared my 1st grade self. I was a big fan, in fact one year for Christmas I got the Michael Jackson doll, complete with sparkly glove. I use to carry him around the house, making him dance as I listened to my tape player Walkman and sang out loud.

Yes, I've always been a bit weird. ;-)